I realize I’ve been relying on my friends quite a lot nowadays . And it’s a bad thing… I’ll just end up troubling them . But the feeling of relaying on someone is just too good … Maybe I’ve been independent for too long … But ……..
Everything just came and eats me up inside . I wish I don’t have to work and I’m freaking rich . That way , I can support my friends so they can be free and we can be spending time hanging out with each other all this . At least their warm laughter can make me feel better . I miss all my friends . And the times I have with them are super awesome . Wondering when will I meet them again .
Money tight .
I guess my pay will be 50-100 from last month . That’s all I have for this whole
Month .. And next month birthday coming .. Gotta work even more hard to pay for that private room .. Why am I not rich ? I’ve also no more motivation go work . Bro and da sao kena fired and I’m all alone there :/
Another problem .
I guess I’ve really gotten over you . But still it’s not enough . I need to move on even further .
On the edge .
Really really feel like breaking down . But I don’t want to . So , I won’t . I won’t trouble the people around me . It’s okay . I’m strong enough .
Like you don’t know what’s going on anymore. Like you don’t care about anything anymore. You’ve lost motivation to do anything. Your mind is set on too many things that you are confused about your feelings, and you can’t explain how you feel either. The feeling of emptiness, and feeling that barely anyone is there for you. Feeling that no one understands you anymore. And it seems like there is nothing to look forward to anymore.
I type so much of my thoughts down . And wanted to post it .. But than a question came into my mind . “Why write so much of your thoughts ? Got use ? Do you think people care about what your thoughts are ?
After thinking for awhile , My answer , No , people don’t care .
*Clear post* .